Thursday, September 30, 2004

The Best Dog In the World

Time to explain why this blog is called the Best Dog In the World.

It's very simple. That is because my dog is the Best Dog in the World. Why? As proof of that, his pictures are on a website called www.TheBestDogInTheWorld.com. Can you brace yourself for this much cuteness?

Many jealous and insecure dog owners who shall remain nameless, whose dogs can't hold a candle to mine have questioned my dog's status as the Best Dog In The World in fighting words. My response is simply this.

Is your dog on the web site called, www.theBestDogInTheWorld.com? Yes, or no? If not, what exactly is there to talk about, Marian? Oops, they were supposed to remain nameless. My bad.

Noah's breed is anyone's guess since his previous owner abandoned him at the aminal shelter. I may have made history by being the first Korean ever to get a dog from the pound as opposed to by the pound.

****Rimshot****

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Disclaimer

My blog URL address is http://davidcho.blogspot.com.

NOT http://davecho.blogspot.com

Now that you are here, you have the right URL. Bookmark it! And nothing personal against this "davecho" guy, but for crying out loud, PUT SOMETHING THERE. Who besides your mother and you would want to look at that?

You are giving us David Cho's a bad name. Literally.

Monday, September 27, 2004

Altar Call

This is a story I heard from a Korean gentleman long ago. It still breaks me up every time I think about it. My attempt to retell it won't do the story much justice, not only because I am a mediocre story teller, but because of the untranslatable humorous cultural nuances.

Shortly after the end of the Korean war, a young idealistic Christian evangelist went on a preaching circuit in remote rural villages to hold revival meetings, not unlike the Billy Graham Crusade gatherings.

The first night, a handful of curious villagers showed up to hear the stranger promote a religion that they never heard of. The young preacher stood behind the podium and presented the good news to the skeptical crowd, after which he invited them to an altar call. But to his dismay, nobody was moved to respond to the call to repentance.

Undaunted, the preacher persisted through the following evening, but still with no visible results. But he noticed in the crowd an old lady in her 80' who showed up every evening, sat in the front row, and wept uncontrollably through the entire message. Convinced that his message finally resonated with at least one person, his voice grew more feverish and poundings on the podium more frequent and louder.

Yet another altar call came and went with no new converts. The old lady wept through the message again, and excused herself without saying a word. At the conclusion of another fruitless meeting the following day, the preacher decided to catch up with the lady before she made a quick exit.

Preacher: Ma'am, would you like to take a step to receive Jesus?
Lady: (blank look on her face while wiping tears off her face). Come again? Jesus, who?

Preacher: (obviously take aback) Jesus can cure your troubled heart and wipe your tears. Can you tell me what has been troubling you.
Lady: Well, sir. My mutt that I had for 10 years died last week. I miss him terribly. He was a great dog. He was my constant companion. The only companion.

And sir, you look just like him (starts weeping again uncontrollably..)

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Black Widow!!!!!!

Sorry for sounding like Klaxon here, but Oh MY!!, just outside the door out to my backyard, there it was. I had never seen one before, and only read about and saw them in books and movies.

So is this it for me? Has my house been infested? How dead am I?


Friday, September 24, 2004

Dear Professor Cho

As some of you know, I moonlight as a part-time instructor at Cal State University, Fullerton teaching undergraduate computer science classes. The following is a series of emails I received from a certain student who was sweating out his grade after taking the final exam.

You will not want to miss the gems. Just as you would do with a novel, be sure to read them from start to finish to fully appreciate the rapidly thickening plot. Without further adieu, here is his first email.

Mr Cho, could you please post the final grade by Monday so I know whether I pass or fail the class. Because the summer class will begin on this Tuesday 5/30 for (course name withheld)(if I fail I have to take again, I know time ahead to register). Last semmester you did not fail any student, can you do again this semmester. God will bless you, and more students will take your class if you pass everyone this semmester. See you later. Your admire student, We all love you.

40 minutes later....


David, please post the final grade so we know what to take for summer. Please don't fail any body. Thank you


I wrote him that grades would be up shortly. He wrote me back.


Thank you David. I need the grade by tonight. Tommorrow thursday is the last day to register for summer school.


Then a few hours later...

Hi David, I am still waiting for the grade to be posted. I can not sleep tonight if I don't see it be posted. Please take care for me.

I finally posted grades on my web site around midnight, a few minutes after which I received the following


David,
It is time for me to confront with you. I have a very strong feeling that you hate me so much. You ignore me the whole time. I could not ask you any questions. When ever I ask you question, you either look up to ceiling or around, ignore me and made me stand there without taking to me. Your attitude is not professional at all toward students. You have to answer why you hate and ignore me. I am going to ask you answer this question in front of the Dean. I should not fail your class if you did not treat me poorly last semester. I can not let your attitude stay any longer in CSUF. You have to act professionally and not prejudice against a particular student. Even though I studied very hard in your class but your altitude influenced my grade. There were many times I tried to be friendly with you by saying "Hello" whenever seeing you in the hallway, but you never bother to say hello to me back. I need your justified answer or I am going to speak to the Dean.

In addition, it seemmed that you don't have enough knowledge for (course ID withheld) class. You always had many excuses and never explained clearly in class. You used so much class time to chat with your favorite students.

(his name withheld)
P.S. you can explain to me by (his phone number withheld)


At 5'7", I can only dream about improving my "altitude." Still can't see how my "altitude" caused him to fail my class though.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Second day as a blogger

This is my second day as a blogger, and one question that naturally comes to my mind is how many people have read my blog. So far, only two people have been told, one of whom is Jenny Smith. Jenny is a very cool friend of mine who just started her first year at Princeton as a seminary student. Go check out her blog if you are interested in learning what coolness is all about.

Is Jenny the only person who's read it? Or has my first post created an instant buzz around the world among tens of thousands of people who have become my adoring minions overnight (if so, preferably more females than males)? What is my budding audience like?

Back in my early twenties during my formative days as an impressionable young man, I took a theology class taught by a student from the seminary housed on the campus of the church I attended.

The young instructor was quite a fiery orator. He spoke very loudly and powerfully with his wildly fluctuating hand gestures to match his imposing voice. It was as if he was addressing an audience of tens of thousands of screaming fans at an outdoor pep rally. Well, you get the picture. The thing is there were only 5 of us in a small classroom of roughly 15 desks, and one can imagine how his voice reverberated with the door and windows closed after receiving a few complaints.

Far be it for me to criticize one's public speaking skills as a so-so speaker myself, but it kind of bothered me that he seldom made eye contact while showering us with undodgeable (is undodgeable a word?) spit balls. But you gotta love his enthusiasm. Perhaps today he is a pastor of a large congregation numbering in tens of thousands somewhere.

What does that have to do with my blog? Maybe I should start acting as though my audience numbers in tens, and even hundreds of thousands and my readership ranges from dweebs/geeks like me to movers and shakers of our society whose highlight of the day is reading my blog. Hey Mike (Mike is the guy who taught my theology class), if you are reading this, what class was it that I took from you again? Yes, I was the guy who kept peppering you with those annoying questions about dog heaven.

And just in case Katherine Zeta-Jones has not been informed of the inauguration of the David Cho blog, could somebody volunteer to email her. Thanks in advance. And oh, Lucy Liu too while you are at it. Thanks. But please don't bother with William Hung. Thanks again.

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

My first post

This is David Cho's first blog entry ever to be posted on the Internet. I was encouraged to sign up for an account mostly because a lot of my ex co-workers from GNP were doing it and it just seemed like a fashionable thing to do these days to flex one's prowess of some kind, and the thought of being left out would surely keep me up at night if I didn't act, so here I am.

English is my second language, which makes the task of formulating coherent sentences a challenge, but I will do my best, if you promise to bear with me. Well, can't think of anything interesting or profound to say, so I will bore you to tears with what I did yesterday.

Yesterday, I attended a church sponsored class for men called "Self-Confrontation." It is said to be cover a wide range of topics faced by men who are desirous of improving themselves in spirituality. For your information, I belong to a conservative evangelical church, to which the only exposure you have may be from the much derided "Religious Right." Well, we will talk about that more.

The topic yesterday was Christian Love. The teacher went over the various aspects of what it means to love and asked us to rate ourselves in each area in self-reflection. Love is kind. Love is patient. Love does not provoke. Love is...

Rating myself in each of these attributes of love is a tricky proposition, because my interaction with other humans through the day is quite limited due to my employment situation. I am mostly alone all day working on programming projects for various customers as a self-employed software engineer. And when I do interact with my customers, the $$$ sign before me surely prevents me from being unkind, impatient, and provocative. The motive for my kindness, patience and gentleness has more to do with maintaining and nurturing business relationships, and little to do with love.

No, this is not meant to be a sob story of how lonely I am. But don't let that keep you from feeling sorry for me and dropping me a line.