Friday, August 07, 2009

A new word coined

How does a blogger know if his "blogging friends" truly value him?

Invent a new word, submit it to urbandictionary.com, promote it on your blog, and beseech your so-called blogging friends to give it a thumbs up.

Back in March 2007, I did just that, and announced the births of two new words coined by yours truly. It has been almost a year and a half and the words "e-enemy" and "blogamy" have garnered a whopping 23 and 26 thumbs up votes respectively.

I will not confirm nor deny that all of the votes came from me.

Here is a new urbandictionary.com submittal which I hope drop everything to give a huge thumbs up. Vote early and vote often.

gomorrah

To treat guests with disrespect and inhospitality.

According to popular belief, rampant homosexuality in the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah incurred God's wrath and the subsequent destruction of the cities. However, according to liberal scholars of the Bible, whether homosexuality was the primary reason remains debatable. Arguing from Ezekiel 16:49-50 and Matthew 10:14-15, they assert that inhospitality played a significant role.

They have a point. Nowhere in the Bible explicitly states that homosexuality prompted God to set off a divine nuclear explosion on the two cities. The Bible doesn't say it, and I don't adhere to the school of that-goes-without-saying any more. I will leave that to the upstanding citizens of the Westboro Baptist Church. Moreover, the aforementioned passages do explicitly mention the cities' failure to "help the needy and poor" as one of the main reasons.

But, I can see where people on the conservative side of the debate are coming from.

You may recall the ugly incident in Genesis in which a mob of men surrounded Lot's house and called out his guests, so they might "have relations with them."

Think about it. If a bunch of men attempted to force me into (how should I say this) a boinking fest, "inhospitality" wouldn't be my choice to describe the ordeal. That's just me.

Also how left out would you feel if you were a citizen of Gomorrah? How come only Sodom has played a prominent etymological role for words depicting homosexuality, leaving Gomorrah to play second fiddle?

Besides, even if newly uncovered evidence placed the blame squarely on inhospitality as the primary reason behind God's judgment on the cities, it would be too late to abolish the words derived from Sodom.

I cannot picture myself of accusing my buddies of "sodomizing" me just because they are too lazy to stock up the refrigerator with my favorite brands of beer.

(I cannot believe I just wrote that.)

Hence the proposal to use Gomorrah to describe inhospitality. This will hopefully placate the concerns raised by the liberal side of the debate while conservatives still have the city of Sodom to kick around and unleash their homophobic indignation on.

Throw Gomorrah under the bus! It is long overdue. The inhospitable scumbags of Gomorrah have been spared from our self-righteous condemnation for too long!

Usage Example:

You are cordially invited to a dinner party at David Cho's residence. You should come because David will NOT gomorrah you.

PS: Do you notice "hospitals" aren't all that "hospitable" especially if you have an HMO insurance? When was the last time your doctor brought you a coffee and a bagel before putting on those dreaded latex gloves on? Yikes.

19 Comments:

At August 08, 2009 1:29 AM, Blogger Jenn said...

That was delightful. That's the David I know and love. Although I do not technically know you, not in the Biblical or even the Gommorahean sense.

What took you so long?

Good to have you back.

 
At August 08, 2009 6:54 AM, Blogger Granny said...

Good morning. You missed the part where Lot pimped out his daughters.


And later on, once his wife had been turned to salt, slept with them.

 
At August 08, 2009 10:47 AM, Blogger PetsAreFood said...

Dear Sodom,

You're finally back online. Nicely done, too bad Lisa is traveling up north because she's been waiting for your updates for a very long time.

I think Granny's comment is aptly put.

Love,
Gommorah.

 
At August 08, 2009 11:20 AM, Blogger David Cho said...

Thanks Jenn.

Granny, you are absolutely right. But you know us. Let's throw gays under the bus, and ignore the despicable things in the story.

 
At August 08, 2009 11:25 AM, Blogger David Cho said...

How far "up north" is she traveling? Is she traveling where Eskimos live (which she mentioned in her blog) without access to the Internet?

Incidentally, I will be traveling up north next week as well. You know, our modern day Sodom - Sin Francisco. Love it there.

 
At August 08, 2009 3:08 PM, Blogger Granny said...

I spend far too much time explaining the full story of Sodom to the "cherrypickers". However, I've convinced one or two; at least so far as that one passage is concerned.

 
At August 10, 2009 8:39 AM, Blogger Gary Means said...

David,
It has been worth the wait. It's so good to have you back. Please don't make us wait another six months for the next post.

I propose that gomorrah eventually become g'morrah and then g'mor, given the American proclivity toward abbreviated slangification. Hey, I should look to see if slangification is in the urbandictionary. The most common form of slangification is to turn a noun into a verb.

 
At August 10, 2009 9:18 AM, Blogger David Cho said...

Thanks Gary. I oppose abbreviating the word. That is because I want people who "gomorrah" to be called "gomos."

The DMV office in my city is filled with gomos.

 
At August 10, 2009 9:48 AM, Blogger Jenny said...

Dave - funny entry. Actually, just last night I was joking with Gavin (my fiance), asking if he wanted a "nose massage." Basically, my idea is that he can insert his nose in my butt and I will fart. (I say this as a joke!) He responds with, "well, is that on Urban Dictionary?" Now I know how to get it up there on Urban Dictionary!

But regarding your analysis of the story, the story really is about inhospitality, and in my opinion, when people claim the story that it is about homosexuality, they are showing themselves as biblically illiterate.

 
At August 10, 2009 10:34 AM, Blogger David Cho said...

GROSS!

I tend to agree with you.

Ezekiel 16:49-50

As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, your sister Sodom and her daughters never did what you and your daughters have done.

'Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen.

I've heard lots of sermons on Sodom and Gomorrah and none ever mentioned the passage from Ezekiel.

Funny how that works.

 
At August 10, 2009 11:04 AM, Blogger The White Wave said...

3 things:

It is actually pretty difficult to find the sin in "Sin Francisco." You have to look for it, and I don't waste my time like that. What I look for in SF is Mama's restaurant and their awesome coffee cake, which is so far from sin that it can't even SEE sin. It's Heavenly! And, you can't get more hospitable than sharing this home made coffee cake with your customers.

I oppose shortening gomorrah to g'more, as it might be confused with s'mores, which are absolutely ungomorrahean.

I agree that nouns are turned into verbs daily. "Friending" someone on Facebook? IMing someone? E-mail me? E-mail is a noun!! What is happening to the Enlish language??? Maybe I'll text you my thoughts on that.

 
At August 10, 2009 1:06 PM, Blogger Granny said...

Not quite the same thing but "growing" the economy sets my teeth on edge.

As does "arguably". I'd think that would mean we can argue about it but they seem to use it as the opposite. ???

I hadn't read that part of Ezekiel but it backs up what I've been preaching for years.

Have a great time in my beautiful City by the Bay. Wish I still lived there and could meet you. Alas, 135 miles is too far for me these days.

 
At August 10, 2009 1:41 PM, Blogger David Cho said...

Mama's restaurant? Will have to look that up, and enjoy the coffee cake, and brag about it on your Wall. Hehehe.

 
At August 10, 2009 1:57 PM, Blogger Granny said...

There's a place called "Sears" down near Union Square which has a reputation for the best breakfast in the City. I've noticed though that on some mornings the line is around the block.

I first moved to the city in 1958 and I believe Sears was there ahead of me.

 
At August 12, 2009 10:11 PM, Blogger Friar Tuck said...

Great to see you back.

 
At August 13, 2009 10:17 AM, Blogger taintedsky said...

Hmm. It is rather interesting that the only known survivors of Sodom and Gommorah turned right around and committed incest. I'm going to have to readjust my biblical perspective.

Though I suppose incest wasn't that big of a deal back then. Not like it is now.

 
At August 13, 2009 10:26 AM, Blogger taintedsky said...

Unless, of course, you are Ham gazing upon your naked father. Somehow that is a biblical abomination.

Maybe the bible just left out the sordid details of that event.

 
At August 13, 2009 10:19 PM, Blogger David Cho said...

Yikes.

 
At January 07, 2010 2:23 PM, Blogger Lisa said...

Gah, I love the way you write!! And I love to hear myself laughing out loud when Im all alone in a room indulging on your blogs. You're a talented man Mr. Cho!

 

Post a Comment

<< Home