Tuesday, January 01, 2008

When do we get to stone Pat?

Exactly a year ago, Reverend Pat Robertson supposedly heard a voice from God who foretold him of a catastrophic terrorist attack on US soil in 2007. In case you haven't noticed, 2007 has come and gone and most of us are still standing.

The Bible tells us to stone false prophets to death, so I will be off to shop for my commemorative bricks to pummel Pat with as soon as I am done with this post.

I made my own share of prognostications for 2007 and some of you chimed in with yours in the comments. Let's see how they stack up.

>John Edwards will emerge as the front runner
>for the Democratic nomination and John McCain
>for the Republican party.

WRONG. Neither Edwards nor McCain is leading. As a registered Republican, I cannot bring myself down to vote for the party's front runner because his name is Huckleberry. I will not vote for a guy named Huckleberry. Okay, his real name is Huckabee, but that's close enough.

If the November election pits Hillary against Huckleberry, I plan on writing in my own name, and you should too.

>NASDAQ will approach a whopping 2,600 while
>DOW struggles to harbor around 12,700 before
>dipping to 12,000

NASDAQ currently stands at 2,652! Can you say RIGHT ON THE MONEY? I was wrong about the DOW index for sure.

>We will see more of the same in Iraq
>(too depressing to elaborate on why)

It depended on who you talked to a year ago, and it is still the case today.

>Every single one of Nicole Kidman
>movies will be a blockbuster.

I haven't gone to see any of her three movies in 2007 because I'm mad at her. She and I are having some relationship issues right now.

Oh, I'm kidding of course. I rave about Nicole just to make Selma Hayek jealous.

>Pat Robertson's dire prediction of a
>massive terrorist attack on US soil will
>crash and burn (pardon the pun).

RIGHT. Why isn't the "liberal media" calling Pat out?

>If not, he will credit himself for having
>pleaded with God and changing His mind at
>the last minute to spare the country the
>trauma of another 9-11 style attack.

It hasn't happen, but it will.

Of course I am kidding about stoning Pat Robertson to death, but one must ask:  Why do people still write him checks? Can we stone them instead?

Happy New Year everyone!