The Da Vinci Code
That is the last word of the novel.
As my eyes landed on that word on page 484 of the paperback edition of the Da Vinci Code, I found myself fuming. You have got to be kidding me. Seven dead bodies and a 20 hour long non-stop scavenger hunt, and about 6 hours of my time later, that is it?
There are more spoilers ahead, without which I cannot fully express my overall dissatisfaction and bewilderment at the undeserved popularity and hype that this novel has enjoyed since its publication in 2003 which will culminate with the release of the film version next month.
A few more observations about this very forgettable book are in order.
* Could it be any more obvious that the author was angling for an eventual screen adaptation of his "novel"? The whole thing reads like a screen play with two loosely related threads which eventually converge towards the middle. The linearity and simplicity of the plot with neatly intertwined flashbacks in the characters' lives and to historic events scream for dollar signs at the box office on every single one of the 484 pages.
* Da Vinci supposedly planted subtle messages in his artworks to communicate his long held belief that man achieves the pinnacle of spiritual ecstasy through sexual union with woman.
* Then the book mentions Da Vinci's homosexuality over and over and over and over without articulating its relevance.
* It also alleges that Jesus married Mary Magdalene and fathered a child together. Mary eventually moved to Paris to raise the child, and to this day, the bloodline which traces back to Jesus himself has survived.
* Did I tell you the book mentions Da Vinci's homosexuality over and over and over and over without articulating its relevance?
* A few weeks ago, I watched a documentary called "The God Who Wasn't There." It makes a sensational case that Jesus never existed and his life was a figment of the church fathers' collective imagination.
* The book mentions Da Vinci's homosexuality over and over and over and over without articulating its relevance.
* These conspiracy theorists need to do a better job of coordinating with each other. The church fathers conspired to invent the person of Jesus who never existed. And then we find out that not only did he exist, but his genealogical descendants are amongst us?
And they are French? And Da Vinci was a homosexual?