Might as well come clean about this

Just in case you don't monitor my profile page every day, in a few hours, the value of one of the attributes listed will change.



Here is a generous hint to those with twisted minds - my gender will remain as it is - a lesbian trapped in a man's body (My jokes will be better in the new era. Promise).

Warm words of condolence will be greatly appreciated, unlike those on the card I received 15 years ago at the tender age of 25.

"Oxymoron" is a contradiction in terms.
For example,
Military Intelligence,
Soviet Fashion,

and in your case...

Happy Birthday