Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Observing Grief

Having written about the aftermath of my mother's death in the previous post, I thought I'd say a thing or two about grief.

There is no handbook on how to grieve for your loss or grieve with those who grieve, but I think the following quote says it all. Joe Bayly in his book, The Last Thing We Talk About, penned these poignant words after one of his children died.

I was sitting, torn by grief. Someone came and talked to me of God's dealings, of why it happened, of hope beyond the grave. He talked contantly. He said things I knew were true.

I was unmoved, except to wish he's go away. He finally did.

Another came and sat beside me. He didn't talk. He didn't ask me leading questions. He just sat beside me for an hour and more, listened when I said something, answered briefly, prayed simply, left.

I was moved. I was comforted. I hated to see him go.

Brian echoes much of the same thought as he reflects on the funeral he presided over in this beautiful post.

9 Comments:

At September 05, 2007 11:01 AM, Blogger J.OTIS MERSTER said...

Thanks, David.

 
At September 05, 2007 7:49 PM, Blogger Barbara (aka Layla) said...

This little story says so much. I hope I remember it the next time I have a grieving friend, and I hope my friends understand this the next time I grieve.

Thanks, David.

 
At September 06, 2007 12:41 PM, Anonymous susanna said...

Yeah. So, so true.

 
At September 07, 2007 10:00 AM, Blogger Brian Buriff said...

I've been off blogging for a while and just checked in. You're in the embrace of my prayers.

 
At September 09, 2007 4:11 PM, Blogger L-girl said...

Sometimes I wish I believed any of that. It must be so comforting.

 
At September 10, 2007 5:49 PM, Blogger Momma Bear said...

I have been trying and trying to post a comment on your blog for days. Ever since we changed to Google my blog spot has suffered many problems.

You asked me a while back if Buck is good at sharing. Not really, he's spoiled but don't tell him I said so. Ha, ha

 
At September 13, 2007 9:57 AM, Blogger SUPER said...

How true David. It's amazing how sometimes the best conversations are those not had...great friends know that sometimes just being there or just listening mean much more than the advice they could hand out.

 
At September 13, 2007 7:21 PM, Blogger Miss Cellania said...

It's amazing to me how many people would just never talk to me again after my husband died. They didn't know what to say, so they said nothing. Anything at all is better than being avoided. Those who had to be around me (at work) also avoided talking about Jeff, but I very deliberately let them know that A. I WANT to talk about him, and B. you don't have to walk on eggshells around me, just be my friend like you always were.

 
At September 18, 2007 12:15 PM, Blogger wagamama said...

I-girl-
You can believe it. It's true. Ask God to help your unbelief. You will find Him if you seek Him.

David-
One of my best friends lost her mom 2 and half weeks ago. I want to be the kind of friend in your post. THANK YOU!

 

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